The other day my mind was wandering. Which happens. A lot.
So I got thinking, what if Jesus showed up at my door. Yes, that Jesus. The Son of God. Here, I mean, in the flesh, maybe wearing a flannel shirt and jeans, with a warm L.L. Bean coat and boots, since it is Maine after all. It was such a real thought, I got a bit flustered, even looked around, tilted my head toward the door to check if anyone was there. Silly, right?
But it made me think… what if? What if the Messiah made his way up my steep driveway, knocked on the outside door (knocked because the doorbell is not working), and then… I opened it up. Then what?
What would I say to him? Probably something like this:
1. Come on in, it’s cold out there. (He agrees, blowing on his hands, making puffs of steam where warm breath meets below-zero air.)
2. Let me take your coat.
3. Sit by the fire.
4. Can I get you a cup of coffee? Maybe some tea, or water?
5. Bathroom is around the corner there.
Really, is that the best I can do? When I finally stop rambling, stop bossing around the Savior of the world, maybe I’d just shut up and listen. I might also (more likely) say things like,
6. Sorry I messed up so badly. And if you don’t mind, I’d rather not discuss the details. So embarrassing. But you know already… thanks for that.
7. Why did you come here today? I mean, not that you’re not welcome anytime, but was there something in particular you wanted to talk about?
8. What’s it like being you?
9. Do you have favorites? I mean, like favorite foods or colors?
10. What’s the deal with mercy and justice?
At this point I would probably refill his coffee (or tea or whatever) just so I could get myself out of the room and make myself shut up. How many ways can I put my foot in it? And then I’d come back and try to be all hostessy, but when that doesn’t work, I’d go back to asking inappropriate questions, like:
11. Did you ever get angry with your neighbors when you were growing up and they gossiped about your mom?
12. Would you mind taking that plank out of my eye? I can’t do it. My hands are shaking too badly, and my vision is a bit compromised due to, well, having a plank in my eye and all.
13. I don’t understand your love for me.
14. Thanks for coming here today.
15. Should I put some blankets on the couch? Or are you heading out somewhere… else?
16. Come again. Soon.
17. Please don’t go.
And he won’t. Go, that is. I’m not sure about the rest of this imagined dialog, but that. That I am sure of.